My dear daughter,
There isn’t a safe level of exposure to an addict. Also, addicts always think they can control it, but they’re always fooling themselves.
I was playing Ragnarok M in my notebook in an attempt to reduce playtime. I have to perform a lot of configurations to emulate a mobile phone in my notebook. After a short while I was ready to give up because I got stuck in a stupid quest. It happens all the time with these games.
Sadly I finished said quest in a lucky streak and started taking on many other quests. My list was full so I decided to reinstall it on my mobile phone so I could complete these quests on automatic mode while at work. So I wouldn’t have to waste time on it at home.
Last night I couldn’t sleep; I found myself thinking about the game. Also thinking about Eve Online which I thought I had under control.
At 1:30am I just stood up and went to the computer in our small office behind the kitchen and sat there until 4am playing both games. Today I feel extremely tired.
I have not deleted it from my phone yet, but I’d better do it soon; I don’t want it keeping me awake at night anymore.
At least one good thing came out of this: for the first time I am expressly admitting to my addiction and writing the experience down. I hope it helps. I have to put an end to this.
Here’s another good quote from Dutch philosopher Baruch Spinoza: “I have made a ceaseless effort not to ridicule, not to bewail, not to scorn human actions, but to understand them.”
Love,
Dad
Aspergers Dad 